Hijabee : woman,muslimah,mu'minah
Sunday, 9 October 2011 at 16:15
We All Fall
Sincere, heartfelt advice by a sister to get back up and try again.
Dear Servant of Allah; you are a human being. Human beings fall; fall down into a fissure of failure. We sin.
It’s the fall which frightens you; shocks you. The THUD as you hit the cold floor. Suddenly it’s very dark. All the shadows of your past and the fear of the unknown future surround you. You sigh. Still in pain from the fall. Failure. You say to yourself, ‘I’ve failed’. You think to yourself, ‘I’ve failed.’ Persist in this thought and you may just become it.
Still aching from the fall of failure, you’re tired and you’re bruised and broken. You’ve been overcome by darkness and now you know it is time to either make or break your soul. Raise your hands; cry out to Allah the reliever of difficulties and the All-Forgiving. Trust that if you have patience, He will see you through, because He will see you through.
This could be after you say something you shouldn’t have said, do something you shouldn’t have done, or act in a way which is disliked in the eyes of Allah. Prayers become shorter, the tears in your Salah start to cease and the Qur’an is leaving your heart and being replaced by the love of this world. Maybe you’ve given up with covering and are ‘letting your hair down’. But a niggling thought, a squirming feeling at the back of your mind makes you feel something heavy and horrid – guilt maybe?
Things can change. Think and hope for the next time. Don’t give up. Yes, it’s a lot easier said than done. Sometimes slipping down the mountain-side of trials becomes the only thing you think you’re good at. Continuing in sin and persisting in disobeying Allah may seem to be in the heart of every action you commit. But it doesn’t have to be like this. Just don’t be afraid of Change. Change creeps along and places a seed of a thought in your head, or presents a realisation to you, so much so that you suddenly know something in your life isn’t right. It makes you feel uneasy but if this change is directing you closer to Allah, then follow it through. Let the seed grow, nurturing it may be hard work but the result is beautiful, like a delicate flower.
Observing the Hijab was the biggest change for me. It felt risky, because all eyes would be on me and I didn’t know what to expect at school or with my family. I just knew there’d be a change. We need change. And our trials should never hinder us from seeking forgiveness or trying again and again and again.
If you have taken the hijab off, or lessened your Hayaa, please think. Please think again and don’t feel that you can never feel that rush of light which you did when you first started to cover. A different light may emerge. That’s what change causes: difference. Maybe not worse, just different. A different way in which Allah is testing you.
There is always a lot of greater wisdom in every event which takes place, and it’s too much for us to know or even imagine. But we have been commanded three orders which are for our own betterment in all situations and affairs:
Have Trust and Hope in Allah; Fear Allah; Thank Allah –all accompanied with a patient smile.
So when you’ve hit the floor, find some energy. Find that strength Allah has gifted you and try again. We all make mistakes but the biggest mistake is to lose hope in His abundant mercy. Take a fresh look at the headscarf lying at in your wardrobe, or the abaya hanging off the back of your door. Try. Try Again.
“Say: ‘O my servants, who have transgressed against their own souls; do not despair of the mercy of Allah, for Allah forgives all sins. Truly, He is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful. ” [39:53]
Praying for your forgiveness, and that Allah will be your Friend and Protector in whatever battle your soul is fighting.In hope that you will try again.
Thanks~ source :productive muslim..